My Happy Ending
by charmed1s-halliwells
Summary: Set immediately after "The Seven Year Witch". Phoebe reflects on her failed relationship with Cole. She realizes she still loves him and always will. Just when she needs him, she sees him again. One shot. songfic to Avril Lavigne's "Happy Ending"


**My Happy Ending**

**A/n: This story was just burning a hole in my head burning to get out. It's about Phoebe and Cole's failed relationship. Set immediately after "The Seven Year Witch". It actually has an ending that can be happy. Songfic to Avril Lavigne's "Happy Ending". One shot. Shifts from Phoebe's P.O.V to Cole's **

_Let's talk this over  
It's not like we're dead  
Was it something I did?  
Was it something You said?  
_

I wonder why it didn't work out. We were such a good couple, Cole and I. There was a time when we were so happy. I didn't think anything could ever ruin it. I was wrong .I have tried to tell myself that it was because he turned into the source and impregnated me with his demonic spawn. Still, I was so cruel to him after that. I knew in my heart that it wasn't his fault. I wanted to blame someone.

Now I realize that it was as much my fault as it was his. Cole had never asked to become the source. After his return from the demonic waste land I still treated him like he was the source of all evil. Convincing myself I hated Cole only pushed him farther away. All he wanted was to be with me. I pushed him over the edge, and I'm sorry for that . There were so many times that we could have made things right. _  
_

_Don't leave me hanging_

_In a city so dead  
Held up so high  
On such a breakable thread_

The first time I vanquished him, I thought I wouldn't survive. I had lost it all in that one day. My baby, the love of my life…it was all gone. I had been the one to take it away. At the time, I thought it was the support of my sisters that helped me through. In truth, what they were doing did the opposite of help. They made me believe that Cole was, and always be evil. On some level, I always knew that he was innocent.

Since he was finally vanquished, there's been this gaping hole inside of me. At times I tried to fill it with other guy. I never loved any of them, not really. I've never loved anyone as much as I will always love Cole. Sure, there was Miles, Jason, Leslie and even Drake. I loved them all in a way. I was never _in _love with them. Not the way you're supposed to be. Cole was my soul mate. You only get one of those. __

You were all the things I thought I knew  
And I thought we could be

From the first time I met him, I knew he was the one. He was my everything. In many ways he still is. I planned out the future I believed at the time was a sure thing. I wish I still believed in us. __

You were everything, everything that I wanted  
We were meant to be, supposed to be, but we lost it  
And all of the memories, so close to me, just fade away  
All this time you were pretending  
So much for my happy ending  
Oh oh, oh oh, oh oh...

I remember what I envisioned as my perfect man. Once I even made a list of everything I wanted in a man. I never thought that I would find it all in one guy. I found it all when I met Cole. So why did it all go wrong? We had an epic love, the kind every girl dreams of. Still, to many loves like that end in tragedy. He was my true love. He was the **_one_**. I knew it the moment we met. You're not supposed to loose your soul mate.

When I reflect on our past I see it more clearly now. When times were good, they were really good. We were so in love. We fought the good fight together. Even when times were bad, the love was still there. In the worst of times, when Cole was the source, that ripped me to shreds inside. It wasn't his fault, but that didn't mean it didn't hurt. I tried to deny any blame and place it all on Cole. Now I see that it was my fault. I pushed him away when he needed me the most. I should have fought for our love like I said I would.

We made an unspoken promise to each other. We promised our love would last forever. It seemed like it should've. I blame myself. Cole never gave up on our love. He never will. I flat out told him that I hated him and I never wanted to see him again. He never gave up because he knew I didn't really mean it. I didn't really mean any of the hurtful things I said to him. I am so sorry. __

You've got your dumb friends  
I know what they say  
They tell you I'm difficult  
But so are they

He watched Phoebe every day. It was his love for her that kept him from moving on. She was still the most beautiful thing he had ever seen. And so he watched her. Cole had nothing else to do in this cosmic void. Through there speed dating and brief relationships, she could tell she was unhappy. It was obvious that she still loved him. It was her sisters that were holding her back.

Piper, Paige and even Prue had always been so narrow minded when it came to him. They had all viewed him as evil and as a threat. He knew that Phoebe had never felt that way. Her sister cringed every time his name was mentioned. They told Phoebe was better off without him. Phoebe reacted with longing. To an outsider, it would be obvious that she misses him. Her sisters thought they were doing what was best for Phoebe. They were blinded. _  
_

_But they don't know me  
Do they even know you?  
All the things you hide from me  
All the shit that you do  
_

They've never been able to see the good side of him.It was the side Phoebe saw. It was the side Phoebe fell in love with. When Phoebe pushed him away, it was the side that stopped him from giving up. What Piper and Paige want for Phoebe is not what Phoebe wants. I know Phoebe better than any of them ever will. We are soul mates. Phoebe still craves adventure and excitement. She still fears the normal suburban life. Her sisters aren't like that.

Everything Phoebe did after I came back from the wasteland hurt me deeply. The way she ended it, asked for a divorce, told me she never wanted to see me again…that was devastating. I never blamed her. After that fiasco when I was the source, I can't say I would have welcomed me back with open arms. It takes two to tango. _  
_

_You were all the things I thought I knew  
And I thought we could be_

I thought that we would have the perfect life. I expected to have a fairy tale marriage. I wanted to be her prince charming. I hope some day she'll realize that it can still happen.

_He were everything, everything that I wanted  
We were meant to be, supposed to be, but we lost it  
And all of the memories, so close to me, just fade away  
All this time you were pretending  
So much for my happy ending_

I have just come to a realization. Cole still is my everything. I am in love with him. I don't say it in passed tense anymore. The second realization had been more difficult. When Cole came back, I was too blinded by pain to see what was right in front of me. I've been in denial for so long that it was surprising that I came to this realization at all. I guess it was on the day Drake died that I accepted my responsibility. I felt Cole in the room that day, I almost heard his voice. That's when Piper told me that the "friend" that helped her out was indeed Cole.

As much as I like to rebel and love adventure, I still yearn for a fairytale marriage with Cole. I still hope with all my heart that it is still possible. I've been staring at this one picture for hours. There was nothing really special about it. It was just an ordinary picture of the two of us on a date. It was taken very early in our relationship. What I couldn't get over was how happy we looked. We were so carefree. I felt so loved, I knew I was loved. And I was in love. We thought nothing could destroy us. No one ever thought it could have gone so wrong. __

It's nice to know that you were there  
Thanks for acting like you cared  
And making me feel like I was the only one  
It's nice to know we had it all  
Thanks for watching as I fall  
And letting me know we were done

For some reason, being reminded of how good it was only makes it hurt more. There was a time when the world consisted simply of the two of us. You were my world. When I lost you, my world fell apart. I tried to stay strong. I tried. If not for me, then for my sisters and the power of three. I made sure they couldn't hear when I cried at night. They didn't know that while I pretended to move on I still needed him.

I knew when it was all over. I knew when all chances of reconciliation were gone. After years of fighting for our love you gave up on me. You gave up on us. I can't say that I blame you. At least you tried. I was too stupid to do anything. I couldn't see that you needed me. I didn't want to see. Now I need you Cole. I need you. There was a swirl of energies in the corner of the room. It couldn't be…I didn't believe my eyes. __

So much for my happy ending

"Cole?" I asked. This was impossible. Then again, as a Charmed One, nothing was impossible. I rushed over to him and kissed him more passionately then I had ever kissed anyone in my life.

He looked at me with those eyes I so adore and said, "I love you Phoebe. I always have. I just held him, afraid to let go.

I looked straight back at him and I replied, "It's always been you. It always will be." We held each other that night, and for the first time in years I knew everything would be all right.

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